I was looking through my backlog of clothing pictures I took for my blog over the course of a few months ago (most of which are not posted and probably won't be, as they didn't make the cut)... and I came across this one. This was a series of self-timer pictures that flash didn't go off for, so the picture is noisy, and looks a bit flat in coloration.
Three years ago (and pretty much all times before that), the way my calves look in this picture would have made me cringe. Too much visible musculature. "Why are my calves so big?!"
I've been reading a lot about femininity, about gender roles, and indirectly, this reading also relates to self-esteem, at least for me. Why did I loathe my natural build so much? Cultural conditioning, yes, absolutely. Models, the theoretical feminine ideal, don't (appear to*) have muscular legs.
But why on earth would a muscular woman be un-attractive? I don't look like a man, and barring major steroid use, it's unlikely I ever will. What is wrong with the appearance of strength, competence, and independence?
I've realized that I like being a powerful woman. I like being strong enough to lift heavy things for myself. There's nothing wrong with that, not really... no matter what cultural messages I've internalized over my lifetime.
I love my big, muscular, defined calves! They look awesome in my fabulous second-hand BiuBiu dress with my incredibly comfortable Born wedges. Muscles are not incompatible with femininity. Being female is often the opposite of being weak.
Looking at this picture, and realizing this made me realize that...
I want to share a picture of my big muscular calves. No photoshop. No shame.
* Several years ago, I stumbled across a before and after photoshop of Britney Spears in ads for Candie's, where I saw how much they had removed definition and the appearance of muscle from her legs. Because that is, apparently, an "imperfection" just like bruises.
I love this post :) I used to be a competitive swimmer in early high school, and (combined with the fact that I build muscle easily), I had quite the defined and powerful-looking arms/shoulders/legs! I was embarrassed to be "different", but also proud of my strength. It was/is a part of who I am, and I consider it feminine, awesomely feminine.
ReplyDeleteAnd you look great! Your posts have really helped motivate me to push myself into trying to find a better exercise routine (something I fell out of after the regimented sports of high school).
Thank you so much, Boosaurus! I love defined, muscular arms, seriously (I'm always trying to further mine with mixed luck).
DeleteYou are awesomely feminine, and I'm glad for any motivation you've gotten from my posts for more exercise-- it's not about what you do, it's just about doing it!
Physical strength is a great privilege and a wonderful gift. It's tragic if girls and women are brainwashed into being ashamed of it.
ReplyDeleteFun Fact: My nickname is inspired by the character of a female gladiator in a pretty violent fantasy novel.
And those calves look great.
Neeva, that is an awesome sentiment-- strength is both a privilege, and a gift (I know some naturally strong athletic young men who likely don't realize how exceptionally gifted they are)!
DeleteI know someday I am probably going to be weaker (natural result of aging), but for now, I don't want to have to ask someone else to pick something up for me (help me carry something that's too big for either of us alone, is a different matter).
That sounds like an amazing nickname to have, and thank you for the comment!
Great post =)
ReplyDeleteI have a quite big muscles on my legs, specially outside-thigh. when I was in my early teens, I was not so keen on this, but neither did I hate it. And since I was skiing (like slalom) all the time back then it was natural that I got muscular legs.
However, a couple of years ago, I just realized over-night that I loooved my muscular legs, and that my ideal for my legs is just like they are, but with the muscles better defined.
It's awesome that you never hated your legs, synerrir. I feel like I've had a similar realization arc-- that actually, I really do like my legs the way they are, and sort of jumped to wanting them more muscular and defined, rather than an impossible (for me to achieve) ideal of slim, un-muscled legs.
DeleteThanks for the comment!
I always liked muscular calves. I blame my mom. She got teased as a teen for having "skinny" legs and praised my sister and I for our "big legs." (We have big calves). I thought it was normal and desirable. :D
ReplyDeleteThe only thing that sucks is finding knee high boots.
I love that your mom encouraged strength! I think slender legs are beautiful too, in their own way, but that doesn't make muscular legs "less than" either.
DeleteIt is pretty darn hard finding knee high boots! I have a pair of Dr Martens Bellissa style (just slightly under knee-high on me), and they look pretty nice and are very comfortable (despite the heel-- they do have a platform in the front, and sturdy tread-- more practical than you might expect from the aesthetic). You can see them with the Urkye pocket dress in the "Urkye order-- final part" post (about 8 posts back from this one). I've got about 15 inch calves and they fit upon first wear, and they are leather so they fit better with time!
Thanks for the uplifting comment!
Mine are about 15 too! Oddly, my calves hardly change size at all. Even when I gained weight, they stayed the same (but my thighs gor bigger). I still have around 30-35 pounds to go until I hit my goal, but my calves are at their final resting point...
DeleteI have a couple of Puma boots that fit. These really cool lace-up boots from Geox. Now I need a dress pair of knee highs with the right heel and I'll be golden. I do have a 3inch stiletto boot from nine west that fit!
Mad respect to you for embracing your muscular calves. I love it when I read stories like this of women who embrace their beautiful,powerful, and muscular calves the way you've embraced yours. As a guy, I fail to understand why women think that having skinny legs like runway models is more attractive. I think I speak for most guys when I say muscular, shapely calves on a woman are way more attractive. If I had to pick between a woman with muscular toned calves and one with skinny calves, I'd definitely lean towards the one with muscular calves, even if the one with skinny calves was prettier.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment, Tsephe! I also think it's wonderful for women and men to embrace their natural builds, regardless of what is the favored build by popular culture at the time!
DeleteI do tend to believe that all women are beautiful in their own way, but I'm glad that I've become more comfortable with my natural build and features!
My fiance is a really big fan of my build, especially/ including my strong (dare I say powerful?) legs. It's wonderful that there is so much diversity in human preferences, so everyone can find something they like!
Hi! I'm sorry writing a comment so long after your post... but for me it's the same - I have muscular legs (ok, some fat on that, too :D ). I cannot find boots that fit and even for jeans I barely find some where my legs fit in and my butts are not lost in amounts of fabric... Myself, I really like the 'Olympia' from Pepe Jeans and I could not find any good alternative yet. Do you have some suggestions?
ReplyDeleteThanks for your great blog!
Greetings from Germany!